In The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom, Hyrule is overrun with monsters. The greatest of them all? Its players. Link’s new Ultrahand power is ostensibly a tool to take on all the challenges Ganondorf and his minions can throw at you. It’s also great for crafting entertaining vehicles. But for a select group of twisted minds, Ultrahand’s sole purpose is to help them deal with little Koroks and their all-too-heavy backpacks.
You’ll encounter one of the overencumbered fellows in the game’s opening sky island, and they pop up numerous times later. Each encounter, they'll require your aid in reaching a distant friend. Sure, some players find unconventional, steak-based methods of transportation for the little guys, but most still aim to actually get them there.
Not everyone is quite so kind. It started off innocuously enough, with early players sending the little guy soaring off on a one-way flight from the opening sky island.
But things didn’t take long to escalate, in numerous and worrying directions.
Korok Space Program day 2: After adopting a more typical rocket shaped structure I had high hopes for this brave korok, however the extra weight had some unexpected effects of todays launch. pic.twitter.com/5wewLqESBT
— HopCat (@HopCaterpie) May 13, 2023
First, there’s the Korok Space Program, in which the unfortunate tree sprite becomes an unwilling test subject on rocket trials that even Kerbals wouldn’t dare take part in.
Korok Space Program's first launch! #AFPlaysTotK #TearsOfTheKingdom #Zelda #NintendoSwitch pic.twitter.com/IQ6xPraUIJ
— ArmoredFrog (@nsarmoredfrog) May 13, 2023
Next came the Korok rotisseries.
Ladies and gentlemen,
— Pory (@pory_leeks) May 11, 2023
I present you the Korok Rotisserie machine. #ZeldaTearsOfKingdom pic.twitter.com/LCtsRdfGov
And then the firing squads.
Korok execution thread
— Oyff (@Oyffie) May 14, 2023
Starting off with the Korok Firing Squad beta v4#TearsOfTheKingdom #Zelda pic.twitter.com/ucJlLYWHwr
At the pinnacle? Bizarre and harrowing rituals in which players crucify Koroks, parading them around behind a horse, or sacrificing them to the Depths below.
Another day dawns over the fields of Hyrule, another Korok meets their demise in Tears of the Kingdom... pic.twitter.com/btmVhX2z01
— liccnuke (@liccnuke) May 17, 2023
We’re starting to suspect that Ganondorf might not be the real evil after all.